Just because the author of this petition has seen several pornographic anime, he calls for all anime to be banned. What about those totally innocent anime series, like D-Gray Man?
It's also very funny that people want this to be banned, that to be banned, all in the name of 'bad influence'. Note that I'm not saying that certain stuff like porn should not be banned.
I think one day people will start banning each other, just because they are supposedly 'bad influences'. Then the earth will soon become desolate, because everyone would have been banned, in some way or another...
I went to the library last night, and picked up that book...
Anyways, I've finished reading it le; here's a review of Angel Blood since I'm sooo bored right now...
Angel Blood
Author: John Singleton Pages: 311
Sypnosis: This book is about 4 children, namely Lights Out, Chicken Angel, Cough Cough and X-Ray. From their names its obvious that they are no ordinary children.
The story is set in a medical isolation unit, known as the Bin to the children. The children long to escape from that place, mainly because of how the nurses and doctors mistreat them.
Then Nail and his girlfriend Natalie come along, and through a strange series of events, the children manage to escape from the Bin and are aided by Nail and Natalie. But will they be able to help the children in their quest to search for the 'Sky Boat' of the dreams, or will they buckle under pressure and return the children to the Bin? How will they survive while on the run? Read the book to find out!
My comments: This book is definitely NOT for those who have short attention spans. Firstly, its over 300 pages long, and the 'action' comes in only at page 200+. However, as you read this book you're probably realise that there's a 'dreamy' feel to it... mainly because the book is written in first-person perspective, and the narrator is one of the children... from the narration you can tell that the children are like heartbreakingly innocent... because of their isolation they have no idea about the world around them... it's an interesting book, overall... and must be read slowly, carefully and thoughtfully... don't try to 'chiong' through it in one day like I did. =D
If you liked this, check out: 1. Heaven Eyes by David Almond
And if you manged to read through my lousy book review, congrats!
Friday, November 28, 2008
quiz.
/10:52 PM
That was my dinner. Aren't you jealous? ;p
Anyways, just becoz i like doing quizzes and I'm sooo bored, here's a quiz from Nicholas's blog:
1. what's the connection between you and the last person that called you? Shenesse: cell group.
2. do you ever turn your cell phone off? never.
3. what happened at 10.00am today? I was eating breakfast?
4. when did you last cry? Recently.
5. what is your favorite thing to eat with peanut butter? Bread.
6. what do you want in your life right now? A better family.
7. do you carry an umbrella when it rains, or just put up your hood? an umbrella. =D
8. what's your favorite thing to have on your bed? myself.
9. what bottom are you wearing now? black permudas. (sp?)
10. what does the nicest text in your inbox say? Too lazy to type everything out...
11. do you tend to make a relationship complicated? I dunno.
12. are you wearing anything you borrowed from someone? Why would I?
13. what was the last movie you caught? Madagascar 2.
14. what are you proud of? Being myself.
15. what does the oldest text message in your inbox say? Jason: Ren Jie, whats ur level position?
16. what was the last song you sang out loud? Disenchanted.
17. do you have any nicknames? what are they? Too many to mention.
18. what does your last received text message say? Wait... isn't this the same as question 15? o.0
19. what time did you go to bed last night? 12.50 A.M.
20. are you currently happy? contended =D
21. who gives you best advice? Haven't received advice for a long time... but a certain Sec 4 senior has been dispensing good advice recently. =D
22. do you eat whipped cream straight from the can? My sis eats it straight from the SPRAY... but I don't.
23. who did you talk on phone last night? No one?
24. is anything bugging you right now? I wasted 1h 30min reading a VERY boring book...
25. what/who was the last thing/person to make you laugh? My sis.
26. do you wear toe socks? who does?
27. who was the last person you missed a call from? Mum.
28. have you ever had your heart broken? Yeah.
29. what annoys you most in a person? Irritating-ness.
30. do you have a crush on anyone? Myself.
31. have you ever done cocaine? waddaya think?
32. what is the colour of your room? Light green.
33. would you kill someone you hate for a billion dollars? nope.
34. do you believe in the saying "talk is cheap"? No, talk can be valuable...
35. who was the last person to lay in your bed? Me.
36. who was the last person to hug you? Myself.
37. have you ever cried in school before? Yes ;( Quite long ago, i think.
38. Choose one: being able to teleport yourself anywhere in the world at any given time or being able to fly? Neither. Why will I want teleportation for?
39. have you ever think someone died, when they really didn't? My grandma, when she became a mindless zombie... just kidding. =D
40. what is the reason behind your profile song? I have cancer Just thought of that song.
41. who was the last person you saw in your dream? Hmm... can't remember.
42. last time you smiled? Earlier tonight.
43. have you changed this year? Definitely.
44. what are you listening to right now? Love Lockdown by Kanye West.
45. are you talking to someone when you doing this? nope.
46. do you walk with your eyes open or closed? Wad do you think?
47. is there a quote you live by? nope. Why do I live by something an old geezer said, when they're much better things to live by?
48. do you want someone you can't have? nope.
49. have you ever played an instrument? of course... piano and guitar.
50. what was the worst idea you've had in week? Ordering black pepper cheese baked rice at eighteen chefs.
51. what are you drinking now? My saliva.
52. are you happy with your love life right now? waddaya think?
53. how long did your shortest relationship last? What kind of relationship? ???
54. does the person know that you like him/her? ???
55. who always makes you laugh? My sis, when she goes totally random.
56. do you speak other languages other than english? Chinese, VERY little thai, CSS, HTML, ROT13 (when I want to), Brainfu*k (jk, but I wish I could write it...)
57. are you blond? nope.
58. what is your middle name? stupidity.
59. what are you doing tomorrow? stoning at home?
60. what do you think you are like? I'm like.. me. *sheepish grin*
61. who will you choose to die with? I don't really care.
62. where have you been today? the library, the foodcourt and home.
63. Is there something that reminds you of someone every time you see or hear it? long, catlike finger nails and people with an obsession with death. Reminds me of Darren.
64. who are you missing right now? no one.
65. if you've to choose between friends & love, who will you choose? what kind of love? and who are the friends?
66. what are you doing right now? breathing. Typing out the answers for this quiz. Wondering how stupid this question is.
67. which primary school are you from? GSPS. As if you will know what that stands for...
68. name 3 colours that you like: Black, white, orange.
69. do you trust all of your friends? yeah.
70. has someone dedicated a song to you before? As nicholas said, there's ting ma ma de hua, which wad dedicated by my teacher to the class.
71. if you have something troubling you, what will you do? Talk to God.
72. who did you last chat in msn today? I din't chat with anyone today... I'm a sad, lonely geek.
73. who's your tenth text from? My piano teacher.
74. which month are you born in? May.
75. how are you feeling right now? Mixed feelings.
76. what is the time now? 11.40 P.M.
77. where are you now? At home... duhx.
78. what colour did you use to dye your hair? I used TRANSPARENT colour, so you can't see my BEAUTIFUL hair anymore!
79. why are you doing this test? Becoz I like doing quizzes, and I'm bored?
80. what do you do when you're moody? Go totally emo at first, then seek God's help.
81. what colour shirt are you wearing now? White. Nicholas knows this shirt very well.
82. what's your biggest secret? I'm a boy.
83. suppose you see your ex kissing another person what would you do? I don't have an ex... but anyways, I'll just like.. don't care, becoz she's my ex, rite?
84. do you prefer to call or text?
Text. waay cheaper.
85. do you believe in seeing a rainbow after the rain? not really.
86. if you can have a dream come true, what would it be? Bring my dad back to God.
87. what is your goal for this year? Get rid of some bad habits?
88. do you believe in eternity love? yes. God's love.
89. which is more difficult: to let go everything or forget what happened? Forget what happened. It'd always be etched in your memory.
90. do you really think its global warming now? yeah.
91. what would be harder for you, to tell someone you love them or that you do not love them back? the 2nd option.
92. do you cherish every single friendship of yours? Not exactly... but I'm trying to.
93. do you believe in God? duhx.
94. what was the first thing you did when you woke up today? Breathe.
95. what would you do if you opened up your front door to thousand of surprises? See wehther they're good ones.
96. what'll you bring when you fight? Myself. I'll try to reslove the fight peacefully.
97. what have you regretted doing in your whole life? *censored*
98. what would you feel if nobody no longer cared for you? God still cares for me... but anyways, I'll feel sad, of course.
99. what if your stead two-timed you? I'll put 'Love Lockdown' as my profile song.
100. do you still talk to the person you fell hardest for? fell hardest? o.0
101. love with a guarantee of heartbreak, or never to be loved at all? the 1st option.
Anyways, check out the lyrics to Cancer by My Chemical Romance:
Turn away, If you could get me a drink Of water 'cause my lips are chapped and faded Call my aunt Marie Help her gather all my things And bury me in all my favorite colors, My sisters and my brothers, still, I will not kiss you, 'Cause the hardest part of this is leaving you.
Now turn away, 'Cause I'm awful just to see 'Cause all my hairs abandoned all my body, Oh, my agony, Know that I will never marry, Baby, I'm just soggy from the chemo But counting down the days to go It just ain't living And I just hope you know
That if you say (if you say) Goodbye today (goodbye today) I'd ask you to be true (cause I'd ask you to be true)
'Cause the hardest part of this is leaving you 'Cause the hardest part of this is leaving you
Let me just say that I disagree with practically everything in this song. It's like... even if you have cancer, who gives you the right to tell the people who care for you, the people who love you to 'turn away'?
Anyways, this song just reeks of negativeity. (sp?) Even if you have cancer in its final stage, and all hope seems to be lost, why be so negative? Even if your days are numbered, why not spend the rest of your days with a POSTIVE attitude, instead of languishing in despair and... just telling everyone who cares for you to 'turn away', jsut because you are 'awful just to see'? I'm sure that if you are really in such a situation, and you tell people to just go away, none of them will listen. They will still care for you, and LOVE you just the same.
I think that the usual response to this song would be something like this, "No, I will NEVER leave you." Someone told me that "You are NEVER alone", in response to my post on how screwed my family was. [nosarcasm]How very true.[/nosarcasm]
Ok, just completed my SECOND blogskin. Will take a screenshot tomorrow... I wanna go to bed after this. =D
This 2nd skin took me practically the entire night to do... I started at around 8pm and ended at 11. Infact, I'm wondering how on earth did I take soooo long to make a skin which is like... not very complicated-looking... anyways, this just shows how tough HTML is. ;p
So, appreciate those people at blogskins.com! It takes ALOT of skill and effort to create a blogskin, ok? =D
I did this quiz knowing how the conclusion will be like. Lols... guess I'm really BORED.
Crap No.2
Sex Ed Rocks- Smosh & I Set My Friends On Fire
The chorus of the song is nt bad... but the screaming isn't very nice... Anyways, I Set My Friends On Fire should release this song on their next album... overall its not bad. =D
big day out.
/2:21 PM
I just came back from East Point Mall, in Simei... Went there to get christmas gifts for CERTAIN people. ;p
but anyways, I realised that there's alot of difference between East Point Mall's Popular and TM's Popular outlets.
EPM's Popular
-Not popular at all... not so much people there. -Books are not wrapped up... you can actually READ them. -Wide variety of albums... Managed to find MCR's albums there, which is kinda suprising. Weirdly, they have Hillsong albums there, even though they're not a christian bookstore... -As usual, books are CRAPPY. -Games= not really wide variety...
TM's Popular
-Usually can find alot of BORED ppl hanging out there... -Books are MOSTLY wrapped up... Stoopid TM ppl nvr let us read D: -Albums like crap like that... you can find the latest releases there, but seriously, if you're looking for specific, older albums, go somewhere else. -Boosk are also CRAPPY. -Games? gotta be kidding me...
From all the abv info, I come to the following conclusions:
1. POPULAR SUCKS! D: 2. Both EPM and TM's popular are quite bad... but EPM is better than TM. (suprise, suprise) 3. If you wanna find albums, go somewhere else. 4. Popular has almost everything, from games to albums to books, but they are like a jack of all trades, master of none... no stuff for those hardcore games, no books for the more avid readers.
then after getting the christmas gifts I went for lunch at Banquet, the food court in EPM. And guess who I saw?
HAAAAAASHIMA!!!!!!!!!!!
Yes, I saw our beloved Ms. Hashima there... she was eating with this person with long hair, and I was like 'OMG! Is that Mrs Lim!?' Fortunately, it was someone else. Anyways, she seemed to have slimmed down abit... haha. =D (hope she's not reading this... ;p)
Anyways, I'm starting to wonder whether those christmas gifts are like worth the trouble... it cost me quite abit of $$... but anyways, I bought it le... so no regrets. -.-
I said some time ago that my family was screwed up.
However, after seeing a show on TV, I changed my mind.
There's this show on channel 8, it's called Life Transformers in english, ??? in chinese. =D It airs from 8pm-9pm on Monday. Heard of it before? o.0
Anyways, in this show those mediacorp celebrities go around helping those poor, needy people... and they usually end up doing stuff like giving their houses a makeover, and basically just helping them in any way they can.
Whether the people really benefit from this show I don't know, but after watching these families and sometimes how poor they are financially, I start to realise that I'm not so screwed after all.
Although my father can go crazy sometimes, at least I have a decent place to live in... atleast I have a good computer to post on, at least I have a wonderful broadband internet to use... at least I have parents who care about me... at least I'm healthy and strong... after seeing the plight of others, I realised that all these things are really PRIVELEDGES.
However, come to think of it, there are different definitions of a screwed up family. A family can be quite well-off but not happy, a family can be poor but happy. It's all very subjective, it's all very relative. There's no fixed definition to 'screwed up'... it's all up to you to determine what is screwed and what isn't.
It's all this indefinity (if there's such a word! ;p) that made me decide on one thing: It's time to throw 'screwed up' out of the window.
Why should I pity myself by saying something like 'Ohh, my father is bad, so my family is SOOO screwed?' Why not put away the past and stop focusing on 'screwed up', but MOVE ON instead, so that slowly, we will become a more united family? -------------------------------------------
"A family that eats together stays together"
"A loving family has God in the center of their lives"
Just some of the many quotable quotes from The Journal. It may not be like 100% accurate, but essentially, the above are just a few of the take home points from this very powerful drama. Everytime I hear the narrative in my head I feel touched... even though I watched this drama a few weeks ago. I think I'll never ever forget the lessons I learned from The Journal. It's just too powerful to forget. =D
And of course, it was a 100 times better and more meaningful than the Dramafest play. Not saying that Dramafest was bad, however. ;p
I've been keeping this new post window open for like... centuries.
And I still have no idea wad to write about.
sighs.
Saturday, November 22, 2008
look full in His wonderful face.
/10:09 PM
I'm feeling happy. Genuinely happy. =D
It's very funny how doing some 'mundane' chores can spark off such positive emotions. But then again, chores are not mundane when you hardly did them in the past... ;p And as I said before, it's the simple things that make me really happy.
Ever heard of 'Turn Your Eyes Upon Jesus'? It's in the latest Hillsong album, and it's a really powerful song...
Turn your eyes upon Jesus, Look full in His wonderful face, And the things of earth will grow strangely dim, In the light of His glory and grace.
Everytime I think of this song I feel strangely... happy. It's like those 'rainbow-after-the-rain' happiness... thank God for that. (no sarcasm intended ;p)
update: If you came here in the evening, you would've realised that my tagboard went missing... that's because taggy was suffering from severe depression becoz no one tagged on him... SO TAG MORE, OR DIE!!!!!!!!!! MUAHAHAHA!@!!!!
/8:08 PM
new skin! =D
And oh yarh, I intend to feel up that empty backyard space with something interesting soon... check back for more updates! =D
Over the past few days I've been wanting to post something, but everytime I log in and see the new post page, I feel kinda put off by it... Kinda weird but true. =D
Anyways, went for class outing yetersday.... was abit boring, but still quite fun... And I look weird in the photos. FREAKINGLY weird.
My posts are gonna get shorter, becoz basically I can't think of anything to write about... but I may occasionally still be able to churn out some philospical crap like this post.
Thursday, November 20, 2008
mind's in disturbia.
/7:32 PM
lols... I didn't realised that the class outing is tomorrow! =D
It's gonna be fun... I hope?
Anyways, I'm like in a daze right now. I'm in a confused state.... with no idea what's going on.... call me blur if you want...
bored.
/2:34 PM
I'm freaking bored.
I do almost the same things every day: play cabal, do abit of hw, blog.... I'M BORED.
BORED. BORED. BORED. BORED. BORED.
I could just sit here and type BORED until the day ends.... and I'll know that I wasted another day of my life... I feel like a zombie... I feel dead... I feel BORED.
Tuesday, November 18, 2008
a collection of thoughts...
/6:23 PM
There are alot of stuff I wanna write about in this post.
I promise you this post won't be beyond your understanding =D
The things the characters do, the way they behave is really impossible in today's society.
At least in Singapore, the things those characters do are quite impossible.
It's really funny how fathers can apologise to their sons right after yelling at them, how parents don't scold their children when they are expelled from school... the list goes on and on.
I guess that's why these books are under this category called 'fiction'. Its all fake, and sadly, in the real world, things are VERY different.
Difficulties can be stepping stones or stumbling blocks.
Difficulties can motivate you to achieve greater things, but unfortunately, for alot of people, they are stumbled by difficulties.
It's really hard not to get stumbled. I admire people who still carry on despite all the setbacks, difficulties they face.
Those people who carry on despite the setbacks seem to have one thing in common: They have this desire, this passion to reach their mu biao, to accomplish what they set out to do.
if only we could have that passion... ----------------------------------------------------------------
In the Life! section of today's Straits Times, there's this article about the people of Bhutan. Apparently, they are very happy people.
Do they have huge BMWs, the lastest gadgets, or the most high-tech computers? Nope. According to the article, Bhutan is a rather poor country, and most of the people there are farmers. And they're still happy.
It's funny that although we have more 'comforts' than those people, and technically we are 'richer' than most of them, I'm sure that they are much more happier than us.
The reason? Have you realised that the foundation of our 'happiness' is based on MATERIAL OBJECTS?
Someone said in his blog that 'Suddenly i feel like a 3 year old again. How fascinating the joys of materialism'. How very true.
This post is dedicated to Nicholas, becoz he was the one who kaypo-ed about what happened last night.
Basically, my stupid father went totally crazy, and he was screaming at my sis for something she didn't do.
It was freaky. VERY freaky. As expected, I was caught in the crossfire.
Now that the entire incident is over, it feels like it was a dream... it feels so unreal... yet it really happened.
Half my mind is telling me to never call him 'my father' again. I'm so ashamed of him. He dosen't understand anything at all, he never tries to understand, and he still dares to scream at us? Worst still, his WONDERFUL behaviour is justified by 'work stress'. ooh, what a VALID excuse.
And guess what? even after he is the one in wrong, we still have to ACCOMODATE him and his stupidness. In other words, I can't play comp. while he's around, because that stupid person is a Computer Nazi, and we have to make SOOO many concessions just because of that stupid man.
And guess what? Even though he spends the least time at home, and he's the one who hardly understands anything, and he's the one who refuses to apologise for all the ridiculous things he done, he's the most big-mouthed person, always accusing me and my sis of spending all our time playing comp, when all his claims are based on 'Everytime i come back I see you on the computer!' excuse me, but did you notice that the 'evertime you come back' is usually late at night, when we have already finished ALL our homework?
And does he even care? Obviously, no. He's probably too busy shouting and screaming to notice all this. He's probably too busy ruining my holidays (and every single day of my life soon) to notice that we are his family.
I'm sick of all this.
The person formerly known as my father sucks.
enter the journal.
/6:43 PM
I've abandoned this blog for 2 days... you can't actually blame me becoz I was too busy sleeping, eating medicine and sleeping even more...
But anyways, I'm feeling alot better =D. Went for church just now, and they had this play called 'The Journal'. It was about this family, who basically aren't united as a family and living in their own lives... a situation commonly seen in many families. Then when the children's 'ah gong' moves in, they become more united as a family, and their house becomes a HOME. Overall it was really touching and heartbreakingly honest.
Note to yulian: You should have watched it. =D
Ok, bye for now. =D
Friday, November 14, 2008
cold.
/10:35 AM
Went to watch Madagascar 2 with Nicholas and Jac yesterday. And guess what? After the movie, I kenna high fever of 38.8... all becoz of the stupid aircon...
Anyways, being sick stinks alot. I'm currently feeling VERY cold, and I just took my stupid medicine... come to think of it, this is the first time I'm having fever this year... hahas.
Moral of the story: NEVER WEAR SPEEDLIGHT T-SHIRT WHEN YOU GO AND WATCH MOVIE! D:
my sis is watching Hi-5 on TV now... dunno why she likes it soooo much...
Anyways, check out this video...
It isn't VERY good, but because I play Sims 2 I appreciate the effort the creator put in to get this video together... It isn't as simple as it looks. ;D
and oh yarh, the background music for the video is: Mama by My Chemical Romance.
skin has been replaced... can't find any good non-navi skins... so had to use back this =D
Anways, if I could somehow fit in my playlist, this would be the 1st song:
Here I Am Send Me - Delirious?
Show me a vision like Isaiah saw, Where the angel touched his lips and he sinned no more. Let me hear your voice saying “Who shall I send?” I’ll say send me Lord, I’ll follow you to the end.
Show me a vision like Eziekel saw, An army of light from a valley of bones. Breathe life into these lungs of mine, So I can scream and shout of your love divine.
Search light, burns bright, floods my eyes, Invade me, serenade me, I’m giving back my life.
Here I am send me, Here I am send me, There’s nothing in my hands, But here I am send me.
I’m in Jacob's dream seeing heavens gate, Let me climb all night on my ladder of faith. Wrestle with the angel till my body is weak, Dislocate my bones for it’s you that I seek.
Show me the light Paul apostle saw, When he fell to the dust and he could see no more, Open my eyes, open my eyes, Open my eyes, open my eyes.
I’m frightened what you’ll find, When you open up my heart, I’m walking in the light, Cos it’s light that changes the atmosphere, So take these lips that criticise, And put a song in my mouth that opens our eyes
Go find the song on youtube. It really has a powerful message behind it, and when I first listened to it I nearly cried. (although it is a rock song ;p)
There are 2 travellers in the desert. They have gone without food or water for 2 days, and are going to die soon if they don't find an oasis.
After travelling for some time, the sky is darkening, so they break camp. However, one of the travellers, knowing that they will probably die in the next few days if they carry on like this, continues to search for an oasis. The 2nd traveller has given up hope, and is weeping in self-pity in their tents.
After walking for a while, the 1st traveller finds the oasis, and runs towards it in happiness. he drinks the water there and is happy that he found the 'life-saving' oasis. However, he convieniently forgets about the 2nd traveller in his enjoyment and happiness, and slowly, the 2nd traveller dies...
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I know my story has totally no logic, but it does has an inner meaning. each character represents a certain type of people... and this story has to do with apathy and selfishness.
When you are selfish, you hoard things for yourself, instead of considering other people. 'things' can be anything; from material objects to intangible things.
Quite a no. of things to look out for... actually most of them are like 'cheap thrills', considering they aren't really very big events... but anyways, I'm excited about those stuff.
Also have quite a no. of ideas in my head regarding the class outing... i will be discussing with jeremy about them. ;)
Anyways, its good to feel excited. You should try being excited too. =DDDD
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
And regarding yesterday's post about the chinese book,
I hope you don't feel like... discouraged if you haven't finished the book, because I'm not trying to like 'boast' that I've finished... it's just that I'm happy that I finally finished reading it. If you wanna think negatively, and think about some stupid things like, "Aiyah, renjie soo pro de, I haven't finish the book, I soo noob de!" then go ahead, but it'd be bad for your own self-confidence and esteem. Just don't take it to heart, ok? =D
I like to use single words for my titles, followed by a full stop... it looks quite cool on my blog, rite? =D
Anyways, this is to announce that I'VE FINNALY FINISHED READING MY CHINESE BOOK!!!!!! (the HCL holi. hw thingy) It was 192 pages, and was quite torturing sometimes to sit down and really read... but anyways, with the help of my S500i, my earphones and also the Saviour King album on my phone, I'M DONE WITH THAT BOOK!!!!! w00t!
Regarding that book, it's really touching... I remember that I was reading the ending part I was listening to To Know Your Name by Hillsong... and the atmosphere was like very touching, just like the MTP session, when I was running through the 4th level classrooms while blasting 'Welcome to the Black Parade'. ;)
Overall, the book isn't very hard to read; I didn't have to check the dictionary a single time while reading it! (if you bother to check how to pronounce the names, then that's a different story) And it's about recounts of the suvivors of the 2004 Tsunami... I like how 'flowing' the story is; although the book starts with different characters who don't know each other, the author tells each of their tales with great skill, and somehow manages to interwine their stories together in the later part of the book... It's just like transforming parallel lines into perpendicular lines.. The guy who wrote it is a GENIUS.
If you're too lazy to read what I wrote above, this is the summary: JUST READ THE BOOK. IT RAWKS! =D
It's actually quite interesting to go back and see what you wrote last time, what were your worries and fears last time, how you wrote last time... and when you compare your earlier posts to your more recent posts, you would probably see a difference. Esepcially for nicholas, who will probably see a BIG difference in his posts after August 30, 2008, as compared to those before. =D
Sometimes I try to please everyone, and I'll feel so angry, so sad.
But when I don't do that, I'll sacrifice some stuff for the sake of others; and I'll feel so bitter, so sad that I had to disappoint people, so sad that I'm being overloaded with stuff...
sighs.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Angst is a German word for fear or anxiety. (Anguish is its Latinate equivalent.) It is used in English to describe an intense feeling of strife.
blogging revelation.
/1:10 PM
I'm going to be completely honest with you in this post.
Last night(or should I say VERY early this morning ;p) I learned an important lesson about humility: I'm not humble. Not at all.
You may wonder why I say that... let me tell you why. I thought about what I usually talk about in this blog, and I asked myself: "why on earth am i posting sooo much about christianity, God and this kind of stuff? What is my purpose for doing so?"
Sadly, the answer seems to be, "To impress people."
It's getting harder and harder to be honest with you in this post... in fact, half my mind is telling me to scrape this post, relegate this into my drafts, so that it will never be seen again...
But anyways, I think it's very important for me to address this issue. I have a feeling that alot of people will hate me after I post this... but it's still important.
I said that I don't like "despo. attention seekers" But am I an attention seeker myself? Why do I post just to impress people? Why am I trying to get attention for myself through this blog?
From now on, I'm gonna be humble about what I can do, who I am, because I don't deserve all this attention that I was trying to garner. You may see me blogging in a completely different style... but don't fret.
Hahas... my sis wants me to dedicate a post to the monstrous beast (dog) called SHIRO! =D This will be the official shiro dedication post... but first, I got loads of stuff to talk about...
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ These are a couple of questions which are related to renjie. Go find out the relation yourself.
1. What is Speedlight? Go google it up and you're find alot of junk about nikon cameras. But the speedlight we are concerned about is the youth ministry of Lighthouse Evangelism.
Speedlight is a vibrant ministry, held every sunday in both woodlands and tampines. Basically, you have to be there to know how wonderful it is.
2. What is that about keeping rhythm with no metronome? Go google up 'Handlebars- Flobots' and that will solve part of the mystery. The 2nd part will be solved by talking to this specific character in AuditionSEA, IGN "Metronome". This character is somehow related to renjie, but is not played by renjie.
3. What is HTML? He Transformed my Life. Or alternatively...
[!DOCTYPE html PUBLIC "-//W3C//DTD HTML 4.01 Transitional//EN" "http://www.w3.org/TR/html4/loose.dtd"] This is[strong]html[/strong]. It is [u]related[/u] to Renjie in a certain way.
Replace all the [ ] with < >.
4. What is CSS?
Cascading style sheets. Once again, related to Renjie.
5. Who is en and Somehow?
People who are related to Renjie. En may or may not be en quan, Somehow is also somehow related to renjie.
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hahas... I'll give the shiro dedication thingy a miss... gonna do it tomorrow. -_-!!
More specifically, the 'rainbow-after-the-rain" mood. XD
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Many a times, its the simplest things that give me happiness.
For example, if I get everything I ever wanted or dreamt for, will I be happy? Definitely NO.
Let's use the iPod Touch for an example.
If you read my blog regularly (I hope you do!) you would know that I wanted an iPod Touch. I have 'thrown away' that wish, because I realised that its quite pointless to be chasing after this kind of new technological fads; one day the iPod itself will be a thing of the past.
Even if i get an iPod, will I be permanantly happy because of it? probably no.
I find that I can only write this kind of 'chim' posts when I'm really depressed.
Lols.
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Anyways, if you think this is 'chim', consider this.
If a normal, average 13- year old can think about this kind of things, if an average person can be reflective, and reflect on his life, why can't you?
If you can't (or don't bother to) reflect on your life, I think your life is basically meaningless. It's like living everyday just for the sake of living; where is your purpose, where is the hope you have in life?
Anyways, this is what i thin of 'chim-ness': It's nonsense.
I'm sure that you're not mentally challenged; I'm sure you have great intellect... its only whether you bother to use it. God gave you a brain, which is supposed to be stumilated(sp?). He didn't give you a brain just to shut out stuff that is 'chim'; He gave you a brain to question, ponder, find the answers, and LEARN.
So, I hope you will read my posts... even the reflective ones.
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Stuck in the mud. Some people are like that.
Some people refuse to see their errors, refuse to admit that their wrong. They have such a bloated ego that even saying a simple 'sorry', is as difficult as dropping a nuclear bomb directly on Shiro's head.
When they leave God, which they know very well is not beneficial to them, they still insist that He wasn't there for them.... and when you try to probe deeper, they just shun you off with "You don't understand what I'm going through!"
Then they become doomsayers; predicting doom after small, tiny things happen. They become so negative, so pesimistic, that after seeing some undesirable behaviour from an ANIMAL (not even a HUMAN, for goodness sake), they predict doom and start to break down... making others feel so digusted with them...
Then they turn to intimidation. They intimdate the people around them on a daily basis... puttting them on guilt trips... and well, just wrecking their relationship with others.
And when someone sits down with them and attempts to tur things around, they refuse to listen; they refuse to admit their errors. And the cycle goes on...
that was a pretty accurate potrait of someone who is rather close to me. I hoep I will never be like that person...
In this world, there is such a thing called DIVERSITY. Even among humans it is present.
Everyone is different; everyone is unique; everyone has his/her own way of thinking... everyone is DIVERSE.
As I blogsurf, as I read, I start to be disgusted with people; I start to be angry, sometimes even wondering, "OMG! Why is that person sooo inmature!?"
I realised that what i think is inmature can be very thoughtful, reflective, for the other person; what I think is excellent can be a piece of junk to another person.
This is the side effect of diversity; differences form between diverse people, because of the different way they think and the different way they act.
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Its really hard to accept diversity.
Think about this: How many times have quarrels, squabbles, fights broke out between people, just because they share vastly different opinions?
The only way out is one word: ACCEPTANCE.
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Speaking of acceptance, there is a fine line between that and extreme acceptance. (there was a specific term for that... but I forgot it ;p)
Some things which are really out of God's boundaries just cannot be tolerated under the name of acceptance. Homosexuality, for example.
I'm sure some very 'open-minded' people out there will be complaining like siao about what I said; but guys, before you spam my cbox, if you are truly open-minded you should be able to accept new ideas and people's diverse opinions... like mine, for example.
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I think that my style of writing in this particular post is making it hard 4 ppl to read...
Congrats for getting this far. Here's a smiley for enduring my HORRIBLE english. =D
I just downloaded the entire Hillsong Saviour King album to my phone... and guess what was he file size?
72MB!!! *faints*
Anyways, thank God for my 1GB Micro SD Memory Card... otherwise my poor S500i would be suffoucating in the huge amt. of stuff I put inside. XD
Now listening to: Break Free =D
Tuesday, November 4, 2008
another random quiz....
/9:08 PM
I took this from Nicholas =D
1.Do you have secrets? of course.
2.Would you fall in love with a guy older than you? I know my boundaries...
3.Do you enjoy going to school? Depends on when you ask me this.... ask me after exams and I'll say 'yes', ask me just before exams and I'll say 'no' =D
4.What would you do with a billion dollars? No idea.
5.Will you fall in love with your best friend of the opposite sex? How will I know? o.0
6.Which is more blessed, loving someone or being loved by someone? DEFINITELY loving someone.
7.List out your 15 favourite songs. 1. Be My Escape - Relient K 2. Famous Last Words- My Chemical Romance 3. Welcome to the Black Parade- My Chemical Romance 4. Disenchanted- MCR (again!) 5. I Need You - Relient K 6. Who I Am Hates Who I've Been- Relient K 7. To Know Your Name - Hillsong Live 8. Elevator- Flo Rida feat. Timbaland 9. Take It All - Hillsong Live 10. The Best Thing - Relient K 11. What I've Done - Linkin Park 12. Viva la Vida - Coldplay 13. Handlebars - Flobots 14. All at Once - The Fray 15. In The Ayer - Flo Rida feat. will.i.am
8.If you are to choose between marrying a les or gay which will you choose? I'll choose option c: run away to the Democratic Republic of Congo =D
9.Is there anything that has made you extremely happy? Not that I can think of -_-
10.What makes you angry? Irritating people, annoying attention seekers.
11.How would you see yourself in 10 years time?
12.Who are currently the most important people to you now? God, my family. and my friends!
13.What is the most important thing in life? Knowing God, living a life without insecurties and negative emotions. =D
14.Would you rather be single and rich or married but poor? gotta think about this one...
15.What is your favourite colour? White/ Black
16.Would you give all in a relationship? depends on what kind of relationship it is...
17.If you fall in love with two people simultaneously, who would you pick? The one who I genuinely love.
18.Would you forgive and forget no matter how horrible a thing the someone has done? yes.
19.What do you want to tell the someone you like? Hi?
20.What type of person will you fall in love with. ' -Someone who genuinely loves me. -Someone who is honest and confident when with me. ermm... can't think of anything else. XD
Okay, that was one of the stupidest quizzes I ever took... to determine my music type, I had to answer 4 questions with not-very-comprehensive answers.. here is what my answers would have been...
1. What describes you best? Company of few friends.
2. How do you prefer to listen to music? I prefer live concert in a auditorium/ field, prefably by Hillsong or Delirious? If I'm listening to my MP3, then I'll go for good enough volume.
3. What kind of music do you prefer? In terms of genre, alternative rock or CCM (Christian Contemporary Music), and maybe a bit of hip-hop/rap.
4. If given a choice, what would you like to attend?
1. FOP (Festival of Praise) 2009 2. Hillsong Live 3. Delirious?
Lols. Guess I'll just let you enjoy the following video...
The experts say we must always strike a balance... now that you laughed so much, its time to cry... =D
Monday, November 3, 2008
/10:17 AM
Lols... I slept at 9pm last night. As compared to my usual sleeping time of abt 1am, that's very early. =D
Anyways, 2 days I stayed up to watch 跑吧，孩子. (A Jack neo film btw) I watched before, a few years back, but its only after watching it a 2nd time did I really understand the story behind it. It made me realise how fortunate i am, to be able to have New Balance shoes while the children in the story can't even have proper shoes to go to school...
Go watch 跑吧，孩子 if you haven't. Its worth your time. =D
Sunday, November 2, 2008
de.sire, pi.ty
/4:10 PM
It appears that there are alot of screwed up families these days. Like mine, for example.
Sometimes I compare myself to other people I know, and other people I see. I start to pity myself. It's really disgusting, how people compare with each other, and in the end everyone loses; everyone thinks that the other person is better, the other person has a happier life... the list goes ON AND ON.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Everyone has commited this horrible thing: Pitying yourself.
You may deny it, but don't tell me you never felt pity for yourself when disaster strikes, when your results are bad, when you lose your job, when you had a bad day. *start singing Bad Day*
Suffering... why must people choose to question it? Why must people always ask themselves, the people around them, or even God "Why, ___(fill in the blanks urself), why must this be happening?"
Why not just move on? I'm sure that isn't very hard...
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Desire is the driving force behind everything.
I'm sure you can't argue against that. xD
Before you 'Nil sine Labore' you must 'Nil sine Desire'; in other words, you must have the desire to labour before you can really labour.
I think the solution to having an un-screwed up family is this: Having the desire to put things right again, having the desire to say sorry, having the desire to forgive, having the desire to change, having the desire to see a happy family once again.
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You may argue that it isn't easy to move on. You can argue that "No one understands what I'm going through!"
If you say so, then just stay there. Don't move on from your trouble. Spend your day crying, sobbing, pitying yourself in the mess you fell through... while other people who have WENT THROUGH THE SAME THING BTW, are out there, enjoying their life.
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I am directing this post to 2 specific people. I really hope they read this...
And oh yarh, I am deleting the emo category for my posts, because they aren't really emo. They are just REFLECTIVE.
Something funny about when I set goals: I'm undecisive.
Ok, maybe that wasn't VERY funny. But anyways, half my mind tells me to set high goals, because of the "you can reach the clouds" thingy, yet another half tells me to set REALISTIC goals.
Hahas. Anyways, I'm planning to write a story which should be around 5 PAGES (A4 Size btw, Font size 12 ;p) Traditionally my England very tzai one; so dun need worry about me. =D
Anyways, I drew up a list of stuff I wanna achieve this holis; I dun wanna to rot out in front of the comp the whole day...
And my mum is playing oldies on her computer, and they're so old that I don't think Ren Da will know them (no offence)
I also realised something: I don't hate oldies, I just prefer my music playlist over them.. =D
